I'm stressed. In fact thats not a true representation of how I feel. Angry, tired, stressed, worn out, broken, all of the aforementioned and more. This group work's not half as easy as you might think. Kids playing in groups, developing at school and learning to share, yeah sure, that's when you think group work's easy. When you're an adult, a responsible academic scholar? Not so much. Kind of ironic really. I've been driven to delegate specific tasks to each individual in the group, as I fear Friday is too close for comfort given the mountain, nay, Everest of work that is still left to do. I fear that this is turning me into a mini Hitler, a minor Stalin, a poor mans Saddam Hussein, if you will. I half expect the Nazi salute on entering the studio now. But I really am at a loss as to what to do to make sure it all gets completed in time. They don't let just anybody do an exchange and if this, in any way, could of had a better outcome by the end, and subsequently interferes with my portfolio for exchanges, there will be lives at stake. I refuse to lose out. It's a dog eat dog world out in the big world of industry, and I'm determined to be the alpha male.
As you can tell, I don't deal with frustration or failure very well. Which oddly, has it's positives, as it will make me get it all completed in time. And will also, make it bitchin'.
On a lighter note, during studio time today (that's right Mother, I hope you are following this, I was in the studio on a Saturday) absolute delirium set in amongst a few of us, which lead to some silly antics regarding some scrap bits of card that appeared in the shape of pants. This of course, lead to me drawing on some detail and silly pictures getting taken.
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| I'm clearly wearing the pants in this relationship - sorry, I mean group. |
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| Don't air your dirty laundry in public- it only leads to trouble! |
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| ...and her? She's just wearing everyone else's used pants. Nasty. |
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